


you're filthy cute and baby you know it

by nervousbakedown



Category: Crooked Media RPF
Genre: M/M, Phone Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-20
Updated: 2018-06-20
Packaged: 2019-05-26 04:25:25
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,512
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14992721
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nervousbakedown/pseuds/nervousbakedown
Summary: “You don’t get to do that once we start recording, so get it out of your system now, alright?”





	you're filthy cute and baby you know it

Jon loves talking to Dan on Thursdays before they start recording the pod. He looks forward to it every week. On the off chance their schedules mix up and Jon is left without Dan on a Thursday, he always feels off. They prep for the pod, talk about anything and everything that’s on their minds.

No matter what they talk about, Jon has come to anticipate Dan’s soft, relaxing voice for a couple hours a week. It's enough to bridge the distance between LA and San Francisco, at least for awhile.

He hears Dan clears his throat softly. “So are we starting with the dumb midterm takes in this article or...?”

“Yeah, yeah definitely,” Jon replies with a sigh, his chin resting in his hand. The clarity of the line always mystifies him. It sounds nothing like the normal telephone. It's as if Dan is right there, speaking into his ear. 

“Jon? You okay?” Dan asks with a light laugh.

“Hmm?” 

“You there?”

“Yeah, Dan, I’m —” Jon furrows his eyebrows in confusion. He laughs nervously. “I’m here, what —”

“I thought we were going to talk about that stupid Axios piece,” Dan speaks so calm, even-keeled.

“Oh, I must’ve zoned out. sorry,” Jon replies. He’s thankful no one else is in the studio at the moment to tease him about it. Jon has the door closed but doesn’t mind at all, doesn’t feel alone. 

Dan laughs, “Am I that boring?”

Feeling embarrassed, Jon immediately professes that isn’t the case. He talks with his hands even though no one can see. “No, I was listening, I just didn’t hear _what_ you said.”

Jon grips the edge of the table, as if to brace himself for Dan’s response. There’s no way Dan would be anything but nice, Jon knows, but there’s always that doubt he might think he’s being strange or unprofessional, wasting time.

“Ah, listening but not hearing,” Dan says. He just sounds slightly amused, still calm. “You don’t get to do that once we start recording, so get it out of your system now, alright?”

They both laugh at this for a moment. When they stop, Jon can’t help but clarify again what he really meant. “I was actually just, I don’t know, listening to your voice. It sounds like you’re right here with me, it always throws me for a loop.”

There’s a pause before Dan replies, “You know, Jon, it’s kinda like that for me too.”

Jon bites his bottom lip as he wonders what to say back. “That’s true. I guess that’s kinda how phones work.”

“Yeah. Though, if I didn’t know any better, I’d think you were right here beside me making those listening noises.”

Jon can’t help but gasp at that, then flushes because he realizes he just made a listening noise. It’s unbecoming of the podcasting profession, really – all that useless noise. The fact that Dan has paid that much attention to him is both touching and a little embarrassing.

“Oh, I —”

“Relax, Jon, I don’t mind. Actually, it feels… real. Lets me know you’re there.”

“Dan,” Jon grins, laughs under his breath. He knows they need to get back to task, but his mind has been utterly derailed by this conversation. 

“You don’t make those noises as much for Lovett or Tommy, I’ve noticed,” Dan ponders. 

“Really?”

“I don’t think so. Only those ‘mmms’ in the Blue Apron ads, which, to be honest, aren’t that authentic.”

“I guess not.”

There’s another pause before Dan speaks again. “The sighs and those little ‘mmm’ noises I get? Those are real. Those are nice.”

Jon feels warm all over. He’s suddenly hit with the fact that this conversation has fully turned to something that doesn’t have to do with politics or the podcast at all. “You think so?” 

“Yeah, yeah I do,” Dan pauses a moment. Jon can faintly hear his breath in his headphones. “You’re so vocal.”

“Guess I’m in the right profession then,” Jon laughs under his breath. The laugh gives way to a sigh. He can’t help it, with all of Dan’s talking about his sighs and gasps and what not.

“Right there, that’s a lovely sound,” Dan murmurs.

Jon shifts in his seat as he thinks for a moment. He then replicates the sigh he just made a few seconds earlier, although it’s quieter and comes from higher in his throat this time. “...That?”

“Yeah, Jon. I love hearing that.”

“Oh,” Jon gasps in surprise and giggles under his breath. He can’t believe this is happening. Jon never even noticed he makes the noises that Dan is describing. Is Dan really, actually into them like that?

“That’s good too,” Dan replies. His voice goes lower after that. “If I just talk for a bit, will that get you to make some noises?”

“Mmm, maybe,” Jon shifts in his seat, feels himself flush from head to toe.

“I’m so lucky. You make nice noises for me and I don’t even have to _do_ anything.”

Jon moans, his eyes fluttering shut for a moment. He realizes his dick is almost fully hard in his pants. Dan’s right — somehow, nothing explicitly sexual has been brought up, and yet…

“If only we weren’t at work,” Dan says with a regretful sigh. “I could tell you some things that would actually warrant a moan from you.”

“You can,” Jon replies. “Right now, you can. Please.”

“I guess you’re right. I don't know if you're aware of this, but, you’re so desperate. I mean, you’re practically getting off talking to me right now, Jon.”

Jon stammers, his face hot, “I’m, I’m not —”

“Okay, maybe not exactly, but you wish you were. I wish you were... wish you could just sneak your hand down your pants right there in the studio, jerk off while we talk about tax policy, hardly able to hold back your cute noises.”

Jon whines and grips his own thigh. “Fuck.”

“That’s so rude of me, Jon, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t say that when you can’t actually do that, that’s probably gonna drive you crazy. You’re going to be so pent up when we record the pod, you’re going to moan at every little thing I say.”

Tilting his head back, Jon moans and shifts in his seat some more. He opens and closes his mouth, knowing he can’t be as loud as he truly wants to be. He ends up whining into the microphone some more, trying to control his volume. “Fuck, Dan —”

“And then we won't even be able to use any of it, because it’ll just be you sounding like the lustful, _desperate_ —”

Gritting his teeth, Jon moans with his lips even closer to the microphone. He wonders if Dan is as hard as he is, or if he’s unaffected, just messing with him for fun. Both possibilities are enough to drive Jon crazy. 

Jon needs to touch himself, wants to come so bad. He gives up fighting it and presses down along his cock through his jeans. It’s not completely satisfactory, but it’s something. He moans as he squeezes his cock, forgetting where he is and what he’s doing.

A few moments pass before Jon gets an idea. “Dan?” he moans.

“Yeah, Jon?”

“Can you tell me to come?”

There’s a long pause, wherein Dan is no doubt wondering if or how Jon is getting himself off. But he decides to indulge Jon either way. He lets out a sigh before speaking into Jon’s ears, voice low and sultry. 

“Can’t believe you're doing this, Jon. Bet you look so good right now, fuck. You sound so good, so cute, I’m so lucky to hear you moan and whine like that. You wanna make me really happy? You wanna come for me? Just come and moan as loud as you want, mmm, I want you to hurt my fucking ears from moaning so loud, Jon —”

Jon squeezes his cock hard and closes his eyes. He does what Dan tells him to and he comes — he moans from deep in his throat, letting it become a high-pitched whine as it tapers off and he starts panting. Jon can’t really tell how loud he is because of his noise-canceling headphones, and he doesn’t care.

He brings his thighs back closer together as he relaxes, breathing heavily. He sets his palms on the table, on either side of the base of his mic, blinks and stares up at the ceiling as he comes back to his brain. 

A few moments pass in radio silence before Dan talks again. “Jon? Did you really just...?”

“Yeah,” Jon replies. He fidgets in his seat, makes a face as he feels the stickiness in his underwear.

“Holy shit,” Dan says. His voice goes lower when he adds, “that’s fucking hot.”

Jon bites his tongue. “I literally have to go change my pants because of you.”

“Uh—”

“Thank you for that, Dan.”

“Y-you’re welcome.”

“Next time I see you I’m gonna repay you,” Jon says. “Remind you what my noises sound like in person.”

This time, it’s Dan who moans into the mic.


End file.
